Thank you.
It seems like just yesterday I was moving into my dorm. It seems like just yesterday that I left life as I knew it and adventured onto campus, unsure of what was ahead. It seems like just yesterday that I didn't know where my classes were, let alone where I would fit in or find friends. It seems like just yesterday it all began.
Yet here I am, finished. As I sit in my dorm room, all packed into boxes, I can't help but reflect on all the things this year has taught me and how different life is. That's something that people tell you--"Your life is going to be drastically different in college. You will change more than you can imagine." And of course, senior year me thought, "LOL cool. College is going to be really different and, sure, I'll probably grow up more, but how much can life really change?" And then it does. Looking back to where I was this time last year, I feel like I'm in a different world.
I changed. I became me.
"But you were you last year..."
Sure. I was me. But college teaches you to evaluate your life and decide what you believe, who you are, and where you're supposed to be going. Freshman year teaches you to begin that process, but it's an ongoing thing.
I found friendship.
"But you had friends last year..."
I absolutely did, and I value those friendships a lot. But here's the thing--in college, friendships take on a whole new level. You have to make an effort to see each other, but the effort is more than worth it. Suddenly you find that you are with your friends 24/7, but rarely get tired of being around them. You find yourself sitting under the stars with them, pondering life and having deep conversations about life. Friendships become something much more than the people you spend your lunch break with or go hang out with on the weekends. They become the people you share your dreams with, share your hardships with, and share your life with. They become the people who you text when you get a free cup of coffee by the library and when you just have to share about the crazy, wonderful thing that Jesus did in your life. From the tiniest things to the biggest victories or failures--they are your people. And you can't express your thankfulness for them.
I realized what was important.
"But you knew what was important last year..."
Well, kind of. But I also was convinced that my GPA and extracurricular involvement was super important (hint: it really isn't that crucial to the rest of your life). In college you learn that the only things that really matter are the people in your life and the Creator who made them. I've learned that it's important to get good grades and build your future career, but it's more important to care about and love every single person around you. Everyone.
I learned.
"But you learned last year..."
I sure did. I learned a lot last year, but not like I learned this year. This year I learned that most professors aren't horrible (but there are always a few character builders out there...), we can disagree and still have wonderful friendships, there are people who are just as passionate as I am about totally different things...and so much more. College teaches you a lot in the classroom, but more of the learning happens in those moments right before class starts, right after class ends, or in those moments when you are far from the classroom buildings.
I broke out of my shell.
"But you...well, okay, you were a pretty shy and quiet person..."
I was. And I still am. I'm an introvert, and I'm learning to embrace that. However, I've learned that people aren't actually that terrifying to talk to. Yeah, it may be awkward for five minutes, but you could also end up with a new great friend.
I rediscovered Jesus.
"But you knew Jesus last year..."
Yeah, but not like this year. Growing with Jesus is an ongoing process, and it becomes a whole new ballpark when it's you alone. That's why I am so thankful that I found community that has encouraged me to spend time with my Savior each and every day and continue to learn from Him and discover His plan for my life. I have people praying for me and with me about the places the Lord is calling me to go. I have friends who are holding me accountable and challenging me. I have a place where I feel like I am a part of a family--where God is our Father and we are the sons and daughters. We are the world-changers. The Lord has renewed my love for people--all people--and showed me what He is all about.
So much has changed. I am not who I was last year, thankfully. High school was a beautiful season, but I'm in a new place and it is one that I am embracing with open arms.
Freshman year, thanks for all the memories. I don't want to leave you, but it's time to greet summer and sophomore year. It's time to keep growing. It's time to hold this year dear to my heart and take it with me, continuing to grow. Loving every moment.
I love you, freshman year.
Love,
Finished Freshman Me.
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