Season of Waiting

I'm going to be straight up honest about where I'm at right now...I'm in a season of waiting and it really sucks.  In fact, I've been in a season of waiting.  Some of the things I wait for have been brought to fruition and that is wonderful, but there are several other things that God seems to be taking His dear sweet time on.  I've grown in my faith tremendously since going to college, but there are still days I struggle.

I'm waiting on direction.  I came into college with a set career plan and major, and while I definitely think that I was following God's direction when I chose that, He is reshaping what that's going to look like.  I still love what I'm studying and think that my career path is, overall, going to take the direction I saw coming into college.  However, I also am seeing how my faith is intersecting with the passions that God has given me, and that is reshaping my ideas about why He gave me these passions and what He intends for me to do with them.  Here's the catch:  I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT LOOKS LIKE.  I want to.  I want to know what God is going to do with my life and what my career is going to look like, but right now that's not something I'm ready to see.  I have to trust Him.

I'm waiting on my husband.  I know that's a silly, little girl thing to say, but, like, I have friends who are only a couple of years older than me that are getting engaged...and I'm still my perpetually single self.  Being single is actually kind of the worst sometimes...trust me, I've been there for...ever.  Some days (okay, many days) I just really want my Prince Charming to show up NOW.  I struggle to believe God has a plan for me and a future husband.  Yet, I believe and pray that if that's not His plan, He will take that desire away.  Right now, I desire to serve Him in marriage with a family one day, so I believe that if He's calling me to serve Him that way, He will provide.  In His timing.  Not mine.  He can write a better love story than I can, and right now it's just about me and Him.  He'll bring me the right man in time.  I have to trust Him.

I'm waiting on salvation.  Not for me, because I invited Him into my life a few years ago, and He took over, and is continuing to take over every day.  Salvation is something that I am blessed to live in each and every day.  No, I'm waiting on the salvation of several of my friends who haven't had the experience of feeling His love and giving their lives to Him.  There is nothing I want more than to see them feel the joy that we've been given through Him.  I've prayed for one of my friends every day for almost two years.  I've been praying for several others.  I pray for opportunities to witness.  I pray for them to see truth.  Yet some days it just feels like they are moving further away.  But I keep praying, because I know He can do all things.  I have to trust Him.

I have to trust Him.  "Nothing shall be impossible.  Your kingdom reigns unstoppable.  We'll shout our praise forevermore, Jesus, our God unstoppable."

Loving Charleston

All that seems to be on the news lately are stories about destruction of communities and the lives of people within them, with the most recent being the story of the shooting that took the lives of nine church-goers in Charleston, South Carolina.  The world we live in is one full of evil.  However, I struggle with many of the responses to these tragedies.  While the crimes committed are absolutely full of hate, many of the responses are full of the same.  I feel that all I see in response is people pointing fingers at one another, debating where the crimes originated from, who did what to whom, what the overall trends are around the country, how we are spiraling into a world of destruction, and so on and so on.  While I 100% believe that these issues should be addressed to make progress as a society, I question whether in the immediate days following such tragedy should be so full of this.  All of the debate leads to absolute chaos, primarily on the internet, full of people then pointing fingers at not only those involved in the crime, but also "friends" and "followers" with differing opinions.

While the rest of the country appears to be dividing in political opinions and hate, Charleston appears to be uniting in loss, but more importantly...in love.  The words of forgiveness and hope spoken from the families of the victims reflect the God we serve.  In a time when they could choose to show hatred and anger, they are extending forgiveness and love, because they recognize that hate will not win.  Ever.  To me, this demonstrates what I fail to see in many Christians...peace.  We often talk about how God holds the future and because of this we should have absolute peace.  Why don't we then live like that?  I hear so often Christians say this and turn around and freak out over how the world is headed into such destruction and corruption and how horrific it is and so on and so on.  God has it.  Yes, this world is so very full of evil...so full.  But instead of worrying about the world that God holds in His hands, why don't we focus on extending love and forgiveness to that world.  The world is so messed up because there is a lack of love--God's love.  Yet I have hope, because there are people like those in Charleston that are living a life of love, knowing that God holds yesterday, today, and tomorrow.  His plans are greater than anything we can dream.  So instead of debating and becoming hateful over opinions about Charleston, or any other crime that raises it's head, let us do what those in Charleston are doing--let us love.  Let us pray.  Let us do what Marcus Stanley did in his comment on Dylann Roof's Facebook--let us share the forgiveness and hope of Jesus...with everyone.  Let us love like that--loving everyone, no matter who they are, what they look like, what they have done, or where they have been.  For, as Charleston is showing us, love--God's love--will always triumph.  Always.

Lightening The Load

Sometimes life is just downright hard.

I was planning to post throughout this past week about rehearsals for a show I am in and Vacation Bible School at my church, and I will probably reflect on those later, but something more important came up.  One of my friends ended up having a death in the family.  I don't feel that elaborating on details will do any good, but let's just say that the situation took a toll on our whole friend group as we were mourning for her and with her.  It led me to think about just how much of a difference people can make.  Here's what I know: Nothing, absolutely nothing, that anyone can say or do will change or make the situation better.  However, here is what I also know:  You have to be there for people anyway, as day by day they get better.

Let's say you are carrying a large plank of wood.  It is much to large for you to carry on your own, too heavy for you to lift.  All it takes is a few people to come and lift it for it to not be so difficult.  The plank is still too large to carry; the load is not any lesser.  But there is help.  Lightening the load literally takes:
1.  Prayer.  Above anything, pray for people because God can do infinitely more to help people than we ever could.  Nothing we can do will truly help the situation, but He most certainly can.
2. Love.  Tell them that you love them, but also show them.  People love in different ways.  You know what works.  Maybe it's going to fun events with them.  Maybe it's supporting them in what they do.  Maybe it is going out to eat.  Maybe it is simply having a conversation.  Whatever it is, it is important to show them that you care, simply by being there.

This week has been hard, and I know that the coming weeks will be too, but we are trying to lighten the load for our sweet friend.  While we love on earth, we know that our prayers are being heard and that things are happening up in heaven.  God is working through this pain.

Romans 8:18 "The pain that you've been feeling, can't compare to the joy that's coming."

There is always hope.