Dear Mr. Preacher Man

Dear Mr. Preacher Man by the Bowman statue,

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." (John 3:16-17) This is what the Bible says about God and the people on campus/at the University of Kentucky. God loves the world. That means the people. Those humans you are screaming a message of condemnation at? Yeah, God loves them. So if you are claiming to be carrying out His message/mission/ministry/whatever you wish to call it...you'd be loving them. Last time I checked, I don't talk to people I love like you're talking to the people on this campus.


Now, I believe in a heaven and a hell, and I believe that you have to admit to God you are a sinner, repent from that sin, believe in Jesus and all he has done to save you, and confess your faith to be saved. But I also believe that Jesus came to earth with a whole lot of love. I mean, when he took the sins of every man on the cross and died the death I deserve, I'm pretty sure He loved me. And all the students at the University of Kentucky. And, yes, even you, Mr. Preacher Man. I also believe that God lets us choose. And I think that's a beautiful thing, but also a sad thing sometimes. And it's why I don't go around yelling and screaming at everyone that they are "going to hell," because that's putting zero hope in their hearts. They aren't going to go look for that God.


Truthfully, I look around and see a lot of lost people, just like you you apparently do, Mr. Preacher Man. However, here in the last two days that you've been on campus, I'm seeing a lot more lost people who don't want anything to do with Jesus. Well, I do. I want so much more of Jesus. I want Him to overwhelm this campus and this city and this nation and the individual hearts of the wonderful students here at UK. Because I think that when Jesus really shows up--when someone really does His ministry--there is love. Love abounding.


Lastly, to my fellow UK students...Christian or not, I want you to know that you are loved. You are loved by me, but more importantly by the one who set the sky in place. I'm not going to try to make you believe that. I could say I don't care if you do, but that's a lie. I care. I hope you do. Because the story of what Jesus did for me is one that no one can take away from me...he literally took my broken world and made it whole. And I believe he can do the same for you and every other person on this planet. But when you're seeing the people sharing all that hate, I don't blame you for wanting no part in it. But from me (and a whole lot of other loving Christians) to you--I love you, and I am sorry for the hate shown by some people who claim it is from God...for God so loved. I just felt the need to say something because it would break my heart to see someone turn away from the God who loves them because they see hate. So, I love you. Regardless of who you are or what you do. I love you. And so does Jesus. And He is waiting for you with open arms to take you home and into a life more beautiful than you could ever dream. Take hope, for He has overcome the world.

Never Forget

I've been debating what my next post should be.  I've done a lot in the first few weeks at college--there's a lot I could write about, but I haven't felt inspired to write any of those posts...yet...they are coming.  However, on today, September 11, 2015, I wanted to take a brief moment to reflect on the tragedy that occurred on this day 14 years ago.

I don't remember what I was doing.  I do remember watching the news.  I remember the sadness in the air...the atmosphere was full of sadness and brokenness as the air was full of smoke.  I remember drawing a picture of what I was seeing--trying to use art to comprehend in my four year old brain what had taken place.

My heart hurts even today for everyone affected by the attack on 9/11...it always will.  That day will remain one in history that scars our nation.  It cut deep, but the love and community ran deeper.  The beauty on this day is the way people came together--all people.  There were no stereotypes, no labels--we were human, united in our love for each other and the nation we call home.  There was love.  There was community.

I am reminded on this day of a song that we have been singing at Christian Student Fellowship at my university.  The words, sung out loudly by hundreds upon hundreds of college students, tell this story: "I've seen many searching for answers far and wide, but I know we're all searching for answers only you provide, because you know just what we need before we say a word.  You're a good, good Father.  It's who You are; it's who You are.  And I'm loved by You.  It's who I am; it's who I am.  You are perfect in all of Your ways."

He is good.  His ways are perfect--all of them.  He knows what we need before we say a word.  How beautiful is that?  We are each loved so much by him.  We are loved, and every person affected by the tragedy of 9/11 is loved.  That is clear, and we should strive to make it known.  The love shown in our nation towards one another on September 11, 2001 should be shown on September 11, 2015 and every day in between and hereafter.  Love that comes from knowing He is a good, good Father that loves us.  His promises are good.  His promises are true.

Never Forget.

Friendship Heals

While the Wizard of Oz has been over for a few weeks in my life, it is a classic film that almost everyone knows, and I did a lot of deep thinking about the character relations within it.  These are not only relevant, but I think the relationships are very intriguing for anyone who loves the movie, so I thought I'd share.

Toto

Toto may be a dog, but he is certainly Dorothy's best friend, not an inanimate object.  The fact of the matter is that while the other characters are, in essence, with Dorothy the whole time, Toto is never-changing.  Toto is the one who goes through the entire journey.  Toto is the reason things happen.  He brings the friends to rescue Dorothy.  He discovers the wizard.  Toto matters.  Toto is the best friend we all want.  He is the prime example of man's best friend--looking out for what Dorothy wants and never leaving her side except to save her.

Bel Canto Photography

Scarecrow

Scarecrow is so dear to Dorothy because, in Oz, he is the only one there the whole time. Despite his lack of brains, he knows what to do in every situation.  He is there when Dorothy meets each of the other friends, and their friendship's longevity is what makes it so incredibly crucial.  When saying goodbye, Dorothy says, "Scarecrow.  You were my first friend here.  I think maybe I'll miss you most of all."  They are best friends from the moment they meet, and their special friendship is so valuable and crucial to why Dorothy can continue on her journey...she has someone by her side.

Tin Man

I think Dorothy feels the need to help Tin Man even more than the others perhaps, because while the farmhands that are Scarecrow and Lion just don't have a brain and courage, Dorothy's harsh words are what leads Tin Man's farmhand to say at the start of the show, "Don't say that, Dorothy.  You make me feel terrible inside, like my heart was torn out."  Unlike with the others, she is the reason he is lacking.  While in reality, Tin Man has a huge heart, full of love for Dorothy and the friends, Dorothy feels the need to help him due to the past life in her subconscious.  The love Tin Man is full of makes his friendship so important to Dorothy.

Lion

Last, but certainly not least, is the sweet Lion.  I think the bond that exists between him and Dorothy is so strong because of the way they look out for each other.  While the other friends are more independent, Dorothy has to look out for the Lion more and make sure he is tagging along and keeping up as much courage as possible.  Despite his lack of courage, Lion begins to look out for Dorothy as well, showing just how deep their friendship is.  I personally connected to Lion because I often lack courage and am filled with anxiety.  The lesson is that friendship helps heal that.

Friendship Heals

Friendship heals the Lion.  The friends help him gain courage.  Friendship heals the Tin Man. The friends help him gain a heart.  Friendship heals the Scarecrow.  The friends help him gain a brain.  And friendship heals Dorothy.  The friends help her gain a home.

Sometimes my brain doesn't work and I get filled with fear and a lack of courage, making it hard to love/feel loved.  However, this summer (and throughout my life in general), friendship healed that.  Friendship gives me a head full of the knowledge that I matter--that I do have the courage I need to get through life.  Friendship gives me people to love with everything in me, and feel that love in return.  Friendship gives me a home.  God has done the same thing, for I am a friend of God.  And I am beyond grateful that He placed friends in my life this summer and through my life in theatre and school.  As college nears, and my friends begin to part ways, I am grateful.  Friendship heals.

Reminder Close to Me

If you run into me on the street, I look like a somewhat average teenage girl--probably one on the "artsy" side, but average nonetheless.  You might notice the two bracelets that I have recently been wearing on my left wrist, but probably wouldn't think anything of them.  They look normal enough.  However, they hold a deeper meaning to me that you would never get from passing me on the street.

The first bracelet is a Lokai Bracelet.  I got it as a gift and was a bit taken aback by the message it held with it--"find your balance"--thinking that it might be something spiritual, which as a Christian, I feel I need to be careful with.  However, I researched the bracelet, and found this description:

"Each lokai is infused with elements from the highest and lowest points on Earth. The bracelet’s white bead carries water from Mt. Everest, and its black bead contains mud from the Dead Sea. These extreme elements are a reminder to the wearer to live a balanced life – staying humble during life’s peaks and hopeful during its lows."

(Taken from the Lokai Bracelet website)

I liked the concept of it.  After an emotional roller coaster of a senior year, I found the highs and lows of life to be true, and as someone who is often filled with anxiety and worrying, the bracelet became a reminder to me that there are highs, lows, and days in between, but that God is with me through it all.  I like that reminder close to me, on my wrist.

The other bracelet is one that I made out of that friendship bracelet string that we all used forever ago to make bracelets for one another.  If you read my previous posts, you know that I recently was in The Wizard of Oz.  This bracelet is yellowish orange to represent the yellow brick road, and the beads represent the friends Dorothy makes along the way--Toto, Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Lion.  However, the bracelet to me signifies so much more than that.  It represents the yellow brick road I'm travelling--life--and serves as a reminder that I never travel alone on the road of life, but that I have so many friends that I will always carry with me in my heart.  I like that reminder close to me, on my wrist.

I'm not the type of person to get a tattoo, but I imagine that they are to their owners as my bracelets are to me--reminders that I can easily see that emphasize the life I'm blessed with living, the people I'm blessed to have beside me, and the God I'm blessed to serve.

Love, Theatre: My Thoughts Leaving Oz

I spent my summer in Oz this year, playing Dorothy in a local children's theatre's production of The Wizard of Oz.  We closed our eight show run two days ago, and already I am missing the friends I made and the experiences we had together.  It's not like this is my first time having to say goodbye to a production.  Oh no, in fact, this was my fifteenth production that I have worked on as a performer, and that doesn't include all of the numerous shows I've been on tech for.  It was my sixth, with with this theatre, which holds a special place in my heart, as it always will.  No, I have let go of, and said goodbye to, many, many shows...but that doesn't make it any easier, because of what theatre is about.

Before our last show, our director told us why he does theatre--because theatre is all about love, "and the world needs more of that."  Theatre people always talk about their "theatre family," and I think that a lot of people don't really understand what that means, and I'm not sure I can fully explain it.  There is a special bond, unlike anything else, that comes from being on a stage, creating a world that is live and in the moment for a bunch of people sitting in seats to watch.  I mean, if you think about it, theatre is insane.  Who in their right mind would spend one or two months of time rehearsing to create this imaginary world so that people can come and watch them live out other peoples' lives?  Sounds silly.  And yet, hundreds of years later, the theatre is still existent and growing.  Because it's a place where you can go to escape, whether it is by watching this world come to life or making that world come to life.  A place so pretend, but so full of reality.  Theatre brings people together and allows them to all live in one singular moment and experience it together.  Where else do you get that?  It's no wonder there is a bond created.

That creates love.  Love between characters onstage, coming from sadness, despair, hope, and longing--the depth of human emotions that we often try to avoid in the real world.  Love between actors, coming from trust you must have in one another to make a world to share with others from the rawness of your human nature.  Love between the audience members and those onstage, coming from the empathy that is deep within us all, causing us to relate to what takes place on that stage.  Love between humans, coming from what we all are.  Theatre brings to the surface emotions.  Emotions make us human.

I wouldn't trade my experiences in theatre for the world, for God has used them to truly fill my life with so much love and laughter and wonderful memories.  There was one show during the run where I was nervous because I had a lot of people coming to see me in the audience.  Then my focus shifted to not who was in the audience, but who was on the stage.  That was what mattered.  Obviously, I do theatre for the audiences.  I do it to serve people--to give them a break from daily life and to make them feel.  But the moments when I am in Oz were all about who was in Oz with me.  The moments are fleeting.  Theatre is fleeting.  Shows don't go on forever--that's what makes the time we have together so meaningful.

There was a moment in the show--the moment between when Dorothy clicks her heels and when she arrives back in Kansas--that I really took in during the last show.  I stood in the dim lighting, as all of the characters of Oz circled around me before disappearing forever, and took it all in.  This moment was real--Oz was leaving.  Then Dorothy wakes up and realizes that the people she needed were always with her.  This is true.  As the whole land of Oz circles around me and disappears, now only a distant dream, I know that those people are always with me.  The bond we have is permanent, because that's what theatre does.  Oz is always with me, as are all the other lands I've experienced onstage with my ever-growing theatre family.  I carry them with me always.  Saying goodbye is hard, but the love is no less.  The love will never be less...because that's what theatre is all about.  So long, Oz...now on to the next adventure!

Photo from Lexington Children's Theatre's Facebook page, taken by Bel Canto Photography

We're Off To See The Wizard

I apologize for not posting for a couple of days.  I have been super busy due to extended family being in town and my being in rehearsal for "The Wizard of Oz" at a local children's theatre.  I am super excited to be playing the role of Dorothy, alongside a wonderful cast of young people and adults.  It is an absolute blast, but rehearsals are getting later and later.  I thought I'd keep you updated to show what goes into a professional theatre production leading up to the opening night, which for us is next Thursday!  Yesterday we worked Act I and today we worked Act II of the show.  At this point, we are able to run everything, but in the coming days we will be adding technical elements, and on Sunday we add the orchestra, so we are working to polish what we do so we can hand the show over to tech starting Thursday.  The theatre I'm doing the show with is the 3rd oldest children's theatre in the nation, and is the only professional children's theatre in our city.  It is super fun to be involved with them, and I love the atmosphere created by the people there.  I will continue to update, but for now, I'm off to see the wizard (or go to sleep, ya know...).  Goodnight, all!

Loving Charleston

All that seems to be on the news lately are stories about destruction of communities and the lives of people within them, with the most recent being the story of the shooting that took the lives of nine church-goers in Charleston, South Carolina.  The world we live in is one full of evil.  However, I struggle with many of the responses to these tragedies.  While the crimes committed are absolutely full of hate, many of the responses are full of the same.  I feel that all I see in response is people pointing fingers at one another, debating where the crimes originated from, who did what to whom, what the overall trends are around the country, how we are spiraling into a world of destruction, and so on and so on.  While I 100% believe that these issues should be addressed to make progress as a society, I question whether in the immediate days following such tragedy should be so full of this.  All of the debate leads to absolute chaos, primarily on the internet, full of people then pointing fingers at not only those involved in the crime, but also "friends" and "followers" with differing opinions.

While the rest of the country appears to be dividing in political opinions and hate, Charleston appears to be uniting in loss, but more importantly...in love.  The words of forgiveness and hope spoken from the families of the victims reflect the God we serve.  In a time when they could choose to show hatred and anger, they are extending forgiveness and love, because they recognize that hate will not win.  Ever.  To me, this demonstrates what I fail to see in many Christians...peace.  We often talk about how God holds the future and because of this we should have absolute peace.  Why don't we then live like that?  I hear so often Christians say this and turn around and freak out over how the world is headed into such destruction and corruption and how horrific it is and so on and so on.  God has it.  Yes, this world is so very full of evil...so full.  But instead of worrying about the world that God holds in His hands, why don't we focus on extending love and forgiveness to that world.  The world is so messed up because there is a lack of love--God's love.  Yet I have hope, because there are people like those in Charleston that are living a life of love, knowing that God holds yesterday, today, and tomorrow.  His plans are greater than anything we can dream.  So instead of debating and becoming hateful over opinions about Charleston, or any other crime that raises it's head, let us do what those in Charleston are doing--let us love.  Let us pray.  Let us do what Marcus Stanley did in his comment on Dylann Roof's Facebook--let us share the forgiveness and hope of Jesus...with everyone.  Let us love like that--loving everyone, no matter who they are, what they look like, what they have done, or where they have been.  For, as Charleston is showing us, love--God's love--will always triumph.  Always.